January 28, 2014 / 5 Double Date "Rules"
Here are a few guidelines to help make double dates go better.
While I generally recommend meeting girls you are into out just the two of you, sometimes, a double date is the only way you can get an opportunity. How should you proceed? Here are 5 "rules" that will help make a double date more successful.
1. Ensure you are not dependent on the other date for travel/logistics
The last thing you want to do with a double date is have to end it early because the other side isn’t happy. Ensure that there is no logistical reason why you must do so by driving yourself (and your date ideally). You also don’t want other logistical impediments to escalation such as a date that is very far from where you live but close to the other three. Time is also important. Make sure everyone’s evening is free so no one has to duck out early.
2. Build each other up
Making fun of each other is something we do as guys. Don’t overdo it on a double date. Instead, talk each other up. Don’t be so blatantly obvious about it, but you want to increase each others’ value in the eyes of your dates, not vice versa. You aren’t competing with each other here, or at least you shouldn’t be.
3. Be smart with venue selection
I detailed the keys to venue selection here. Not much is different for a double date except to obviously consider that everything has to hold for 4 people (such as seating arrangements that make sense/etc.)
4. Make sure isolation is possible
While isolation technically falls under logistics, I want to emphasize this particular aspect by giving it it’s own point. At the end of the day if things are going to progress, they are not going to progress as a group of 4 but as two groups of 2 (you and your date, your friend and his date). This needs to be possible at some point in the night otherwise potential alone time is wasted in the worst case and delayed in the best case. For instance, if you are going to dinner, schedule it early enough so you guys can also hang at the bar afterwards; don’t go to a small place where you guys have no choice but to be hanging out right next to each other the whole night.
5. Take one for the team
Sometimes, one date will be going much better than the other. If you are in the not so good date, take one for the team and try to extend it as much as possible. Don’t try to end the date early because it isn’t going to happen for you. Keep engaging the other person and do your best to extend things as much as possible.
A double date isn’t that much different from a regular one on one date, but there are a few small differences. Make note of these "rules" to increase your chances on a double date.