July 10, 2014 / 5 Reasons You Suck At Online Dating
Before you write off online dating, make sure you're not making these mistakes.
I’ve said it many times and I will say it again, and again, and again: online dating is the easiest way to meet women. Note I didn’t say the easiest way to meet a certain type of woman, or a woman for a certain goal, I said women. Period. If you are much more successful "in real life" than you are with online dating there are usually three explanations, with the latter being by far the most likely:
(1) — You are a famous celebrity, extremely wealthy, or super attractive and successful guy who picks up a hot girl every night without fail in which case there is no "more successful" than you already are.
(2) — You are very unattractive (both physically and overall) but have convinced yourself that the fact that you are talking to girls "in real life" is success even though you aren’t sleeping with them. (In that case read this article).
(3) — You are simply bad at online dating.
Yes, there could be other reasons (usually being short and unattractive in pictures but with huge social proof/outlier tremendously strong game in certain settings.) but they are rare. Actually, even (1) and (2) above are quite rare. Usually, the actual explanation is (3).
Unfortunately, me telling you that you suck at online dating isn’t particularly helpful. If you want to learn more about an online dating system that works, you can read about Sway Seduction, but before you do that, fix the easy mistakes you are making. Here are 5 of them.
1. You go after the wrong women.
I have some news for you. You won’t like it, but it’s true: you are not god’s gift to women. Neither am I, and neither is anyone. However, for some reason, when guys get online they think that they are suddenly deserving of all the perfect 10s in the world with minimal effort because of a delusion that if a girl is doing online dating, she is already low quality. Some men even reject approaches from women that they would love to date if they met in real life. Doesn’t work like that. If you would never have the balls to approach her at a bar, then why do you think you are going to get her if you meet online, even if you do actually get a meeting? Learn how to avoid going after the wrong women. I wrote about that in more detail here.
2. Your profile sucks.
While looks and pictures is an important component of online dating, your profile is perhaps even MORE important! However, so many men either neglect their profile, come up with something lame in two minutes, or write a drawn out novel that would cure insomnia. A great profile not only gets more responses, it also gets women to write you! Did you read the Sway Seduction page? Read that to check out some of the e-mails I’ve gotten from women using my ‘holy grail’ profiles. Don’t neglect your profile.
3. You message too much.
Messaging too much is one of the most common online dating mistakes. It is also a devastating one. As I talked about here, I usually get a number and arrange a date in only *2 messages*. That’s right, just 2 messages. Sometimes it may take 3, but it almost never takes more than that. Women are online to meet, not make online pen-pals. You can ruin your chances with an interested women if you message too much and don’t know the right messages to send to get her out on a date quickly.
4. You aren’t online enough.
Sorting by "last time online" is very common, which means, while you don’t have to browse a lot online, you want to be logged in as much as you can. This requires almost no effort, but too many men simply do not do this. This is why their name falls to the bottom of the list with women who are searching for men.
5. You don’t change your pictures.
Profiles can go ‘stale’. One way to prevent this is to cycle through your pictures. Your main picture is the most important, but sometimes a different picture might attract a different set of women. Make sure you change things up every once in a while to keep your profile fresh in womens’ mind. Otherwise, women who already saw you will just browse by you again without giving it a second thought, even if, had they opened the link, they would have been interested!
There’s much more to it.
Going from sucking to being a master at online dating isn’t necessarily that easy. There’s a reason I wrote 258! pages about it; there’s a lot to it! However, the first step is not to make simple obvious mistakes. If you want to learn more about a comprehensive system that will not only reveal many more common mistakes men make, but show you how to fix them and more, CLICK HERE.