February 18, 2014 / 5 Ways To End Bad Dates
Stuck in a pointless date? Here are some ways to end it without being a dick.
Sometimes, the chemistry is just off. It’s hard to always explain why it happens (especially if you were attracted initially), but it does. Whether it is a lot of awkward silence, poor body language, a clear lack of interest from your date, or what not, it is often prudent to just end a date before wasting more time and money on something that just isn’t going anywhere. With that said, no one really wants to hurt people’s feelings, so here are 5 ways you can end a date without making it totally obvious your date sucks!
1. Say You Aren’t Feeling Well
If your date is clearly nightmare, just set up from the very early going when you see it isn’t going on well that you "are tired" or "don’t feel that great suddenly". Then turn that into a reason 10-15 minutes later to just call it a night. Most likely if you are so not feeling it, she won’t be either. I generally say something like this, after indicating with body language and casual comments I don’t feel well: "So, hate to do this, but I really aren’t feeling that well so I think it’s best if we get the check. Don’t know what happened, I was feeling fine this morning!" She will figure out what is going on but there really isn’t any point to get into it, just get the hell out of there!
2. Don’t Order/Offer Another Round
If you are getting drinks, don’t order another round, of better yet, if you see you won’t be interested (say it is a blind date or online date where the girl clearly doesn’t look like her pictures), don’t even order a drink to begin with. It’s easy for a date to end quickly when you aren’t even drinking! The "I’m good" after one drink is often a sign of disinterest. She will get it, and it will get you out of there fast. This same idea applies if you are stuck at a bad dinner date. Order food that is quick to prepare and skip dessert/appetizers.
3. Fake an emergency.
Use any flashing light of any kind in your phone to pretend that you have to take care of something, whether it be work or friends. Some people (especially women) set up "save me" calls/texts that come in 45 minutes. This isn’t really that necessary; it’s easy enough to just pretend. Ones I like to use as I am self employed is to say a work emergency has come up. If that doesn’t apply to you, family or friends emergencies are easy to fake.
4. Set up an out ahead of time
One strategy that is sometimes worth using if you aren’t sure even before the date is setting up a "false time constraint." Pretend before the date that you may have to attend to something afterwards. It can be work, study, etc. Don’t make it something that is obviously committal, as if the date is going well you will want to continue the date and forget about whatever story you made up to get you out.
5. Be Honest
The last method is the obvious one: just tell her you aren’t feeling it. Note that I do not recommend this approach, but I have added it here for the sake of completeness. There is very little upside in being that guy, and while everyone pretends they want honesty and appreciate it, it is usually hurtful and not welcome when actually dished out. It’s better to at least come off as a nice guy who wasn’t a dick if there was no chemistry. There is considerable value to that which you should not discount, hence the reason for all the made up excuses.