January 19, 2014 / Be Agreeable With Extremes
Being a challenge isn't always the way to go.
As you probably know if you are a regular reader of Josh Sway, being needy is one of the biggest turn offs for women. For this reason, it is often best to never appear too eager during courtship, to not be afraid of challenging your target woman, and to not allow the fear of rejection interfere with consistent escalation.
Non-needy behavior is often also non "agreeable" behavior. The needy man agrees with the woman regardless of whether or not he actually does. The non-needy man agrees when he agrees, and disagrees when he disagrees. However, despite non-needy being the general blueprint for success with women, there are situations where being agreeable will improve your chances. These situations are the extremes: when she really likes you, or when she hates you.
Agree When She Really Likes You
When a woman really likes you, there is generally a value mismatch. You have demonstrated considerably higher value than she expected or believes she can get in a man. In this situation, the proper course of action is always to not screw it up. There is no reason to risk disagreeing about something that might be really important to her (such as politics, religion, etc.). Instead of disagreeing, simply change the topic or act neutral. She already really likes you, so you do not have to worry about appearing needy or not. You just have to close.
Agree When She Hates You
Sometimes a woman will absolutely despise you. In these situations, it is unlikely you will be getting her in bed anytime soon, but contrary to what you see in bad romantic comedies, the only time a woman who hates a guy ends up sleeping with him is if she thinks he’s incredibly attractive (and even then, the odds are slim). A much better and repeatable method for trying to win over women who "hate" you is to become a bit more agreeable. Challenging her and arguing with her when she is already in the "hate" frame of mind will simply reinforce her feelings about you. Be nice and agreeable until she simmers down a little before turning into the asshole that got her hating you in the first place!
Being too agreeable is often a sign of neediness which women want to avoid like the plague. However, in the extremes, being agreeable is often more effective than staying in "challenge mode" all the time.