October 26, 2013 / Dating Taller Women
Societal pressures are stacked against you, but you can still succeed with taller women. Here's how.
One of the biggest challenges men face is how to seduce a taller woman. This is for good reason, because getting a taller woman is one of the more difficult things for a man to do. The reality is that not only is there a certain percentage of women who simply will not date or sleep with a man who is shorter than them no matter what, there are significant social pressures for women to date men who are taller than them. Fortunately, many women do date and sleep with men who are shorter than them. In this article, I am going to show you how to maximize your odds of being that man.
Why do tall women care about height?
Before we can talk about how to overcome a tall women’s issues with dating a shorter man, you need to understand why they care. I wrote about this in more detail here, but in general, women care about height for three main reasons:
1. Despite having virtually no functional purpose in modern society, evolutionary pressures of the past, when height was important, make height a desirable trait in a mate. Interestingly, tall women are already tall, so for them, the evolutionary need to find a tall man shouldn’t be as strong as a shorter woman. [read more about height and how it matters here]
2. Societal pressures — most women fall into this category. In other words, women care simply because society expects the man to be taller than the woman.
3. They are insecure about their height — some tall women are insecure about their height and thus want a much larger man with whom they can feel ‘small’ and ‘sexy’ around. These type of women are the hardest for a shorter man to seduce.
Getting tall women: theory
Before I get into specific details, I want to cover the principles behind being successful with tall women. There are two main principles that are especially effective with taller women.
The most attractive trait a man can have is not looks, height, or money; it is power. Powerful men, such as many current and former world leaders (Sarkozy and Berlusconi come to mind) have been tremendously successful with tall beautiful women despite often being very short men. Power is the biggest turn on to most women, tall women being no exception.
2. Comfort around tall women
If you want to be with a tall woman, you sure as hell need to be comfortable around tall women! If a tall woman you are interested in sees you are constantly surrounded by other tall women, even if they are friends, it’s a huge plus.
3. Not caring about her height
Not caring about her height is of critical importance when trying to be successful with a taller woman.
Theory is great, but at Josh Sway, we also like to give actionable advice; concrete suggestions you can go out and try for yourself.
On Appearing Powerful
Whole articles can be written about appearing powerful, but if you are not a world leader, celebrity, or famous athlete, you have to find other ways to appear powerful. The best way to do this is to be a larger than life personality, especially in public. Act bigger than you are (without being an obnoxious asshole). If you are going out with a group of friends, be the guy sitting in the middle. Be the guy people are congregating around to hear speak. This is attractive to ALL women, but it is almost a necessity to succeed with a taller woman. If you are the guy on the outskirts all of her preconceived notions about short guys being insecure etc. will just be validated in front of her eyes.
What if you are the guy who is generally the quiet one in his group? Find a sub-group where you are not that guy. Try inviting people over to your place for a gathering, including the tall girl you are interested in. Being the host is a turn on. If you have a friend who generally everyone congregates around, try going out without him from time to time to take the pressure off. If you are taking a taller woman out on a date, don’t try something new and different, go to a place where you are comfortable, or even better, where half the bartenders and staff know you by name.
On Comfort around tall women
There really isn’t much more to add here than what I said about this point earlier. The best way to show comfort around tall women is to be around tall women and act unfazed. Club promoters are a great example of how to model behavior around tall women. Many club promoters go around with an "army" of tall models, even though i have seen promoters as short as 5’2″! Pay attention to how they behave exactly the same whether a girl is taller or shorter than them. Follow that model: it works.
Not caring about her height
This is the easiest one to get right. The technique is simple: do not bring up her height. Period. If she brings it up, your answer should be along these lines: "I don’t know, I just never really cared about height one way or the other." If you message a girl online, don’t comment on her height. If you chat up a girl, don’t use her height as an opener. Trust me, I have a good friend who is a 6’2″ blonde and every desperate loser tries to chat her up with the exact same lines: "Wow, you are really tall?" or "How tall are you?" I’ve seen it in action about a thousand times, and IT DOESN’T WORK.
A lot more can be said about specific strategies for taller women; I will be writing more about this topic at a later date. However, the key principles for succeeding with taller women are in here. Remember, just like everything in dating, there are no fool proof methods, so don’t be discouraged if you do everything right and the height gap is still insurmountable: there are women who simply will not date a guy shorter than them no matter what. The important thing is many will if you court them properly.