January 13, 2014 / How To Handle Being Called Out
Don't get fazed if you are called out by women.
If you are always escalating, always trying to close, you are bound to run into a situation where you get "called out" by the girl. Sometimes, you may even get called out running some PUA routine you saw on re-runs of "The Pick Up Artist", other times, you’ll get called out trying to invite a girl up to your place on a first date. What should you do in this situation? I’ll clue you in, because freezing up like you just got sprayed with liquid nitrogen is not the answer!
1. You get called out on an opener.
Getting called out using a canned opener our routine is much better than getting a F-off or a "turn around and ignore you". You started the conversation, and you got a response that can easily lead to more conversation. This is the main goal in approaching women for the first time, so you have theoretically "succeeded" in opening despite being called out.
Unfortunately, if you just freeze up at this stage, your success will not have gotten you much. There are two ways I like to address this situation. The first is to turn it back at her and ask her what she’s doing watching the pick up artist or why she is so interested in picking up women. The second is to simply ignore her and move on to another question. If she insists on an answer after that, I will often go with a tease, something along the lines of: "I gotta pull out all the expert techniques on a tough one like you." You can also of course use the classic Mystery Line, look at her friend and ask: "Is she always like this?"
2. You get called out for being too touchy
One of the fears you may have (it’s really common) when it comes to "kino" and physically escalating early on is the fear of being called out on it. This has happened to me several times, and my answer is always the same: "Yeah I know, I’m just a touchy kind of guy". If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. There are other good answers here, for example, "Can you blame me?" if you think things are going well and she is just testing your resolve, but in general, I stick to the tried and true method of simply pretending (or maybe it is true) that you are always a touchy guy and that it is just "no big deal". Whatever you do, be touchy, because touchiness/kino, or whatever you want to call it is crucial for success with women.
3. You get called out for inviting her over too early
I almost always invite girls that I am interested in to my place after a first date or the night I meet them. I am a firm believer that moving too slow is a fatal mistake whereas moving too fast hardly results in anything worse than an awkward moment. Unfortunately, if you cannot recover from the awkward moment things can start going down hill. I usually answer getting called out in several ways:
a. "Whoa, I just invited you over for a few minutes to hear me play piano, I’m not that easy!!" [This is why it’s good to provide ‘plausible deniability’: an excuse for her to come over that doesn’t involve sex.]
b. "Ouch! What are you scared of? Do you really think I’m a serial killer or something? I’m offended!"
c. "Oh jeez give me a break, I’m going to go to bed in 15 minutes anyways…"
Basically, the idea is to turn it back at her like she is being unreasonable or judging you unfairly even though you both know what’s up.
4. You get called out for hitting on a bunch of other girls at the venue
I wrote about how you can avoid becoming "marked" in this way, but if you do end up being called out about this, turn it back on her with a line like: "What’s wrong, afraid of a little competition?" If you feel that there isn’t much connection and she’ll just respond "Yea you are right, go after one of them." stick with something a bit more neutral such as: "I like meeting new people, what can I say?"
Being called out sucks at first, but for the most part, it hardly changes your odds, and in some situations, it is better than a lot of other outcomes. Don’t be fazed by it, instead, turn it back on her.