Apr 19, 2014 / Kino Over Kissing
Pass over going for the kiss and opt for heavy kino instead!
When I was younger, I would always go for the "kiss close". Since I was quite a late bloomer, I considered anything I get from a woman to be a win. Whether it be a kiss, a hug, eye contact, or even a general acknowledgement of my existence, they were all "wins".
However, as I got older and more successful with women, things that were considered wins in the past started to drop off the list to be replaced by more substantive wins. Nowadays, anything less than sex, while nice, isn't really a "win", and doesn't really give me comfort that I have truly "gotten" the girl that I want.
Interestingly, what I had also discovered was that ignoring "little wins", and sometimes purposefully not taking them, actually made it easier for me to get the "big wins". One such situation is [glossary]kino[/glossary] over kissing.
<h4>Kissing isn't that important</h4>
I hinted at this several times in the past, in particular with my article<a title="Does A Kiss Matter?" href="/articles/view/does-a-kiss-matter/"> Does A Kiss Matter</a>. The bottom line is that a kiss is nice, but it really doesn't mean much. Sometimes it can be a gateway to foreplay and turn a woman on for more, but usually, a kiss not at a sex location isn't that effective at getting much more than a kiss.
Because kissing is not so important, it often makes sense to build more sexual tension as opposed to relieving some of the tension via a kiss. I wrote about that <a title="Kiss Denial: Get More Than a Kiss" href="/articles/view/kiss-denial-get-more-than-a-kiss/">here</a> in more detail.
<h4>But you still need to escalate</h4>
However, if your date is aching for a kiss, you need to do something. You can't just ignore her, as she will easily get turned off by assuming you are not interested in her. You need to show some interest, and you need to escalate. In other words, not going for a kiss doesn't mean not escalating, it simply means escalating in another way. The way I generally escalate that I've found has been far more effective in many scenarios is to ramp up my "kino" substantially instead of going for a kiss.
<h4>Escalation without closing</h4>
Physical touch is a major turn on and a critical component to being successful with women. If you are not injecting touch into your dates and into your interactions with women, you will fail on a regular basis. Similarly, if you inject a lot of kino into your interactions with women you will succeed on a regular basis. It is this approach that I use to turn women on, and the main reason is that kino is not a "close".
Unlike a kiss, which sends a direct sign of interest and is considered a "close" (it is also considered a "close" to many women), heavy kino is much more mysterious. No woman is going to think you are not interested in her if you are rubbing her leg and running your hands along her waist, but it is almost never considered a "close". No woman will ever think she "got you" because you were very touchy with her. Not the case with a kiss.
<h4>Make the close more than a kiss</h4>
This is what makes kino such a powerful tool. It can escalate things without relieving any tension via a form of a "close". If she wants to relieve the tension, she will want a "close'. You can give her a close, but make it more than just a kiss! In order to do that, try sacrificing the potential for a kiss with more kino.