July 04, 2014 / Luck Is Not A Strategy
Just because someone got lucky doesn't mean you will.
I see this question a lot: "Hey Josh, I’m an ugly, fat pathetic socially awkward loser. How can a fat pathetic socially awkward loser like me get girls?"
The answer to this question is obvious: "Stop being an ugly, fat pathetic socially awkward loser!" Most men accept this answer and recognize that in order to achieve their potential they will have to change more than their interactions with women but their whole being. However, an all too common response from some men is: "But I’ve seen ugly fat weird guys with hot girls before. Why do I have to change who I am when there are plenty of hot girls going out with ugly fat weird guys?"
My retort is usually the same thing: "Plenty of people have gotten rich winning the lottery, but does that make buying lottery tickets a good career?" In other words, the explanation here is that those guys are "flukes". They got lucky. And luck, my friends, is not a strategy.
Counter-examples only disprove certainty
The main problem going on here besides men looking for excuses to be lazy and not to improve themselves is a lack of basic logic understanding: They believe that a counter example disproves a point. This is actually not true. A counter example disproves CERTAINTY. It disproves a statement of the form: "You have 0% chance of getting a hot girl if you are fat and ugly." It does not disprove a statement of the form: "You have a 0.00001% chance of getting a hot girl if you are fat and ugly."
But are these statements really any different for all practical purposes? No. They are not. Yet men constantly think that a counter-example cannot easily be explained away by going from 0% to 0.00001%. This lack of logical reasoning extends not just to dating but to many other aspects of life. It is actually really really important: Counter-examples only disprove certainty.
Make your own luck
Now that you know the flukes you see out there in the world are exactly that, flukes, it’s time to focus on improving your odds of getting in the situation you want, not just hoping you’ll be one of the 0.00001% flukes. One way you can do this by observing the typical situation, not seeking out the fluke to make yourself feel better. Focus on what kind of guys high quality girls are typically dating instead of seeking that one high quality girl who happens to date a guy like you. Learn from the guys who consistently win at what they do, not the flukes. Make your own luck by improving your odds of getting lucky, as opposed to just sitting there hoping to get lucky.