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/ Practice makes Perfect

Dating is no different.

Would you expect to become an NBA caliber basketball player by reading an autobiography of Michael Jordan? How about by reading a book on basketball training written by Michael Jordan’s coaches and trainers? How about by reading every single book on basketball in the world? How about the guitar? Can you learn how to play like Van Halen by studying transcriptions of his music? Of course not! So why would seducing women be any different?

Is seducing women somehow an activity different than every other activity in the universe in that it doesn’t require practice? Is getting women to date you, make out with you, sleep with you, or even marry you some sort of special skill that can be learned and mastered on the very first attempt with the proper knowledge and guide? As much as I wish it was, as someone who spends a considerable amount of my time giving dating advice, it simple isn’t. Becoming a master with women takes practice just like becoming a master in anything else.

This should be pretty obvious; yet for some reason, many, perhaps even you, continue to believe that there is some ‘secret sauce’ or ‘weird trick’ that can be read and then, boom, they transform into Casanova overnight. Don’t get me wrong, there are plenty of techniques and “tricks” that can improve your game dramatically with very little effort. I cover many in various articles throughout the site, and with online dating in particular, knowing a few special techniques can have an incredible impact literally overnight (they are covered in Sway Seduction).

However, to truly become a master with women, you must not only know all the techniques and tricks covered in the books out there, but also how and when to use them. A good book on women will cover when and how to use techniques, as well as the theory behind them so you can adapt when the action sequence in the book doesn’t make sense for the particular context.

That is where practice comes in. In online dating, many seductions do go exactly according to plan which is part of why I think a book on the topic is so valuable, but even online, and definitely in “real life”, not everything goes according to plan and not every technique can be applied exactly as it is described. Knowing how to modify techniques based on the interaction at hand is crucial to being successful with women. You have to learn how to think on your feet; how to adapt techniques for the particular situation and nothing can teach you that better than practice.

Why can’t a book out there really cover every possible situation? The reason is simple. All of us, and all women, are unique. Not every technique or trick will work on every woman; online, not every profile or message technique is congruent with your personality, and not every woman responds to the same technique the same way. Furthermore, even if a book did cover every possible scenario, it would be impossible to be able to recall exactly what you need to do in every situation as it is unfolding without practice.

Practice will help you develop that “seduction autopilot”, where you can immediately sense which technique is likely to work on which women and act appropriately. It’s just like muscle memory when learning an instrument or learning a sport. No matter how much you read about physical activities, our brains are simply not wired to learn them via reading. Our brains are wired to learn via repetition, and seducing women is no different. Practice makes perfect. Go out there (or get online) and start interacting with women.

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