February 13, 2015 / She Liked My Facebook Post…
Why she liked your facebook post, and why it doesn't mean she likes you.
When you’re interested in a girl and you’re trying to figure out if she shares that romantic interest, you can drive yourself crazy analyzing the situation, and end up interpreting even the most insignificant actions as an IOI.
Unfortunately, social media has made this phenomenon even worse as it provides another realm within which you can misconstrue a girls actions as signs of interest. The classic example is the "Facebook like" (or Instagram, Twitter, or any other "upvote" on a social media platform). Unfortunately, a girl liking your posts on Facebook isn’t a good IOI.
But Then Why Would She Like My Post?
I know it is hard to understand how liking Facebook posts is not a sign of interest. This is especially true because when you (or another guy) likes a girls’ post, it’s usually a sign of interest on your part and a subtle way to try to rekindle or start an interaction, and just about every interaction you want to start with a girl usually has a romantic goal. However, women are different!
When a woman likes your post, it could mean she has some interest in you, but it, by itself is not an indicator of interest in the least. Women will like your post for a variety of reasons that have nothing to do with romantic interest. They include but are not limited to:
(1) She thought you posted something funny, cute, clever, or interesting. (In other words, she actually just likes the post!)
(2) She views you as a friend and is using Facebook likes to maintain an interaction with you that is not romantic
(3) She is using you for validation. She knows you are interested in her. She does not have reciprocal interest, but it makes her feel good about yourself that a guy is interested in her, so she stokes her ego by liking your posts knowing that you will immediately use that as an excuse to reach out to her and profess your interest.
(4) She is using it as a subtle passive way to reconnect.
I have found that not only do the reasons above have nothing to do with romantic interest in you, they are by far the most common reasons women like on Facebook.
When Women Are Interested, They’ll Interact With You Less on Social Media
Not only do women like and comment on Facebook pages of guys they are not romantically interested in, often times women will comment and like less if they are interested. Granted, if they have no interest at all and your existence hardly matters to them, they will not post on your wall, like your posts, or send you a happy birthday. However, they may also be avoiding interacting on Facebook if they are interested in you for the following reasons:
(1) They do not want to act too eager or interested. Some men find needy and desperate behavior from women a turn off, so if they are interested, they will not try to be too aggressive and desperate for your attention.
(2) They fear rejection. Women fear rejection just like men do. They also over analyze just like men. If they comment on the wall of a guy they like and he does not respond or responds in a lukewarm manner, they could feel rejection, or it can lead to over-analysis. Women may actively want to avoid interactions that can lead to closure or rejection, especially if they are as minimal as commenting or liking a post on Facebook.
Stop Over-Analyzing Social Media
Facebook likes don’t mean she likes you. Neither does her commenting on your posts. There are plenty of other examples of social media interactions that don’t mean she likes you either. That’s the lesson here: it isn’t just stop reading too much into a Facebook like or comment, it’s stop reading too much into social media period. If you demonstrate interest in a woman, if the feeling is mutual, she will make it known, and generally by more than social media. Social media activity is noise that is best not taken too seriously.